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My year in Thailand made it a second home for me, and I returned last spring for a study abroad semester.Once again surrounded by the transgender community, I started thinking about my sexuality almost every day and this inner conflict re-arose. Julia Serano, a transgender activist and writer, pointed out that it is not acceptable to consider attraction to trans women a fetish, because that reduces them to fetish objects.

Trans women are treated as if they are not worthy of love.

In her speech, titled “The Beauty in Us,” she said, “Because our culture deems us undesirable, our lovers and partners are often expected to explain why they choose to be with us.” After reading that powerful speech as well as many other queer theorists, I stopped feeling so backward.

The heteronormative world in which we live had successfully convinced me that being attracted to transgender women meant I had a fetish.

I began questioning my sexuality and even my masculinity.

It breaks my heart when I remember how nervous she was.

She was afraid to tell me for two reasons: One was fear of rejection.

According to Trans Murder Monitoring, there were 265 trans people murdered in 2012 alone.

Somehow, facing those fears, she mustered the amazing strength and courage to tell me.

Yet, we are not just OK with it; we are just as attracted to trans women as we are to cis-women, regardless of their biological sex.

A few weeks ago, in September, DJ Mister Cee, a prominent figure in the hip-hop community, was “caught” with a transgender woman.

Although I don’t see anything different about my sexual orientation, most people do.

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