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Let’s get this out of the way right off the bat: going up and starting a conversation with someone you don’t know is a time and a place for everything and there are times and locations where trying to strike up an acquaintance with a stranger is a bad idea.

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People who are uninterested in talking to people – especially people they don’t know – will often make a point of signaling that they wish to be left alone through non-verbal means.

They will make a point of closed-off body language – crossed arms, hunched posture, turning away from the general flow of traffic.

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As a general rule of thumb, you need to consider the social context.

Certain behaviors are more acceptable in some places than in others.

With the exception of in particular venues – bars and clubs, for example, or other places where approaching people and being approached is to be – most women are going to be much more on the defensive at night and much more prone to seeing being approached as potentially threatening.

At the same time, you also want to avoid making someone feel cornered or trapped.

than face the possibility of being exiled from dating forever, no?

Unfortunately, this is one more example of why nerds have the worst superpower of all time: the ability to game out every possible worst-case scenario in living color and vivid surround sound, each time worse than the last.

People expect different levels of physical contact at, say, a nightclub than at a bookstore or the gym.

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